Tuesday 29 July 2008

PRO TIPS.

Ok, this is probably a bit weird but it works lots for me, so I'll try and share what comes also from a discussion on The Forum of Forums, UKB.
Talking about testosterone levels and performance, it came up that someone indulges to the practice of masturbation before a climbing or bouldering session, because of the raise in the hormone that could make you perform better. Don't do it. In the words of Big Malc, "Sex makes you strong, wanks make you weak" or something along that, but you got the sense.
Well this is my advice: when you happen to have sex (you are free to chose the gender but it must be human) before bouldering, let's say the night before, the morning before, go straight to the boulders. Don't shower, don't clean yourself (unless you seem to be coming out of an XXX movie), don't shave. Use the same undies. You have to keep the love with you while you'll be bouldering, especially the perfume of your partner. Yes, rejoice in that perfume, feel it over and over, let the memories of the love itself slide under your conscience and drive you up the boulder.
Then, at home after the inevitable success, glow in the glory of your accomplishment and, if man, seduce your partner with pride; if woman, just do the same.
The following day go again and crush. Then make love, then crush.
Here you go.

5 comments:

Jasper said...

Ha ha ha! Genius post. It was Smythe's quote by the way Nibs.

lore said...

sorry for the mistaken quote!!! i think i mistook smythe with smith.

richdraws@hotmail.com said...

What about grudge fucks?

Will I crush the boulders harder from rough sex or some sweet sweet lovin?

pascal said...

But I am absolutely filthy, sweaty, and certainly in no state to dress and go to the rocks...

However, I like the lifestyle! Sex, Climbing, Sex, Climbing, Sex, Climbing, etc. If I could make this happen somewhere very nice in the world I think I would be complete (if Fred had been before and opened an 8C bloc that is).

lore said...

every sex is good for crushing. just as every boulder is.