Friday 17 August 2012

WELCOME TO BITTERLAND


I wrote down this entry a few weeks ago, after reading a particular blog that I won't name. I wrote it in a rush of anger, disgust and envy. When finally the writing was on the wall, I decided not to publish it. Today, though, I read something that made me change my mind. So here it goes, as bitter as I made it.

A few days ago, when the alarm went off, I immediately felt something different: a sudden drop in the temps had made me look for a light blanket during the night and outside the wind was blowing loudly.
My first thought was to remain in bed for another 40 minutes, then to have a perfect breakfast and pack my stuff to go and crush some rock for the first time in weeks.
Unfortunately, being a Monday, I got on my bike and proceeded towards a normal day of work.
Like millions of people.
Unlike millions of people, there are some that can transform my morning thought into reality. Some of these happen to have a blog, and sometimes I read some of these blogs.
A few of them are truly inspiring, yet barely known to the multitude of climbers that proudly adorn 8a.nu: shame for those who don't know them.
Others are simple chronicles, and others are just numbers. And that's fine.
But when I read about a pro complaining about the lack of decent sponsorships; or about having to leave soon for a foreign destination and having no time for current home projects; or about three consecutive days of rain on a two months roadtrip; or about grades inflation; or about the difficulties of having a normal life because of constant travels; or about having bad skin; in all these occasions I'd like to get an axe and destroy everything around me.
In a moment in which there is hardly any job opportunity, people struggle to buy food, or to pay university taxes, the lack of sponsorships or good climbing conditions seems marginal.
Cry me a fucking river.
How can I be so presumptuous to say so? Because they are the crushers, not I. They are the role models, not I. They have to inspire me, that's what their talent is for. I am a bitter bastard, I have and I have never had talent, so I want them to show me that they deserve their talent, and that they put it to the best use: this for me, means being able to share something that's not just numbers or chronicles. I could name climbers that leave me in awe and full of admiration when I hear them speaking or when I read them, but I won't. This is nothing personal, and I have nothing against anyone. What I know, is that from their blogs, and videos, some of the strong ones seem to have the same human depht of an aluminium foil.
In the modern era, really you can speak your mind without saying a word: make a nice video; take nice pics. An image can move a mountain. When I read something that's been written only to fill the page, that's boring or whiny, from a pro, I become a raging beast.

The bottom line is: for fuck's sake, if you have to, run your blog with the same dedication that you put into your climbing and please, start every entry with this line: "Oh my - insert preferred divinity here - thank you so much for the talent you gave me, and for letting me live a dream life made of rock and crushing big numbers".

Finally, and I'm curious about this, I don't know if I'll ever publish this entry. For sure was good to try and search for these words in my fucking mind.
A trip into madness.

1 comment:

Patxi said...

A lot of People, don't look beyond own eyes... Egocentrism it's a capital sin of modern life... Good Reflexion, a pity that only what see around can understand... Keep on fighting Lore! Keep on Living!